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Nickname: SpicyCoolGal Birthday: 23 September Star Sign: Virgo/Libra Personality: Happy-Go-Lucky, Blur, Procrastinate, Careless, Paranoid, Messy, Friendly, Stubborn Fav Actor: Ethan Hawke Fav singer/band: Jewel, ColdPlay, Bon Jovi.



Ethan's Palace

V-Day!
02.15.05 (6:48 am)   [edit]
14 Feb Monday

I had a strange & weird dream today. I don’t know why but I dreamt of people I don’t even know & also my ex-colleague whom had left 5 months ago.

I dreamt of my ex-colleague Jason whom was married and left my company 5months ago. He was my reporting officer as I need to report everything to him. Another ‘main character’ in my dream was a school mate in same faculty when I’m studying in polytechnic. Honestly I don’t even know her name until I woke up from my dream and think real hard before I grasp in horror. I knew who that girl was! I think her name is called Xueling & during my 3 years stay in NYP. I never even spoken 1 word to her & I think she doesn’t even know I existed in this world.

Anyway, I dreamt that Davina & Shiryee were talking to me & I inquired why Davina knows my colleague Jason. She blurted out saying Xueling was her good friend and that is why she got to know Jason.

I scratched my head and replied,” Who is Xueling?”

Davina & Shiryee looked at each other in bemused & chorused,” Oh my god!! I can’t believe you are so blur!! You don’t even know who Xueling was?”

I really had no idea who she was in my dream.

They even reprimanded me saying why am I such a big mouth. Always saying wrong things at the wrong time. They said I shouldn’t have spoken to Jason asking about his wife & keep on adding salt to the wound saying how is she after her childbirth? Is she ok?

I’m blur till they revealed that Jason dumped his wife(with newly born child) apparently for Xueling & I was so shocked!! It was because I had always known Jason to be very devoted to his wife & I can’t believe how time can changes everything! I didn’t see him for 5 months and he got involved with a girl at my age & dump his wife! I’m still suffering from shock & I told myself saying all men can’t be trusted and however lovely dovey a couple seems, the next minute they are apparently off!!

I woke up feeling surreal. Such a strange dream! I even try hard & rack my brains to think who was Xueling till I realised whom she was after some time. I’m feeling perplexed too. Is this dream some kind of a sign to me? Besides today is Valentine’s Day today! What a ‘great start’ on a Monday St Valentine’s Day!

I’m feeling kind of angry and upset also. I mean, why am I so blur? I even appear blur in my dream.....

I’m alone in office typing this out. So many things to do and yet I feel like procrastinating & decided to write this blog instead. It is Valentine’s Day today & apparently no one ask me out. So sad! Sometimes I think I’m being perverse. Come on! I really enjoying my single hood freedom now and doesn’t want to commit to anyone yet another small part of me longs for affection, care & concern for someone. Aren’t I being ironic?
I’m looking at some jewellery ad from newspaper. Oh my!! I have lemming for it! A part of me wanted to purchase some white gold & diamond jewellery for pampering myself and another part of me was thinking why should a girl buy white gold, diamond jewellery for herself? Isn’t it pathetic? Shouldn’t the guy be the one buying the jewellery for the lady instead? Aarrggghhh!!









The first picture remains me of the white gold necklance my ex bought for me on 20th birthday. However, I lost it somehow. Maybe is a sign saying the necklance and him(my ex bf) are not meant to be together. Losing the necklance = losing him forever. Great anyway!! Wearing the necklance bought from him reminds me of that bastard sometimes.

Side track a bit, I read from that Nichola’s bitch blog that my ex & her are apparently off again! Serve them right! I hope they will be spending a lonely Valentine’s Day themselves.


Sun, 13 Feb

9.30am!! That is considered very early for me to wake up on a Sunday morning! Anyway, I need to pay a visit to Paul’s house in afternoon and I didn’t want to miss my brother & his gf for waking up late. Hence, I need to walk bloody 20 minutes under the hot sun to the main road.

I showered, slowly choose my outfit, put on my contact lenses, and also copy down all the difficult words I had read in my notebook from Angela’s Ashes novel.

My brother appeared from his room at 10.30am and I told him I’m going out. They asked me to prepare quickly. We stopped by Thomson for lunch & although I’m really full, I ate a few pieces of ‘Ju Kwek’.

My brother drove me to Paul’s house & I’m the first one to arrive at his house. Ha.. I’m sitting around reading newspaper, his photos & watched few scenes from ‘Shall We Dance’ & a HK movie before Adrian they all arrived.

We ended up chit-chatting, watching Korean movie starring Kim Jae Won & Han Ji Won. It is quite funny & we were all so engrossed in it.

Paul also showed us stacks of his pirated VCD & I choose & taken really alot of his VCDs. Mostly are old movies like ‘The Patriot’.

We took a group photo together & I’m praying hard I looked good in the pictures.

I went for swimming at Toa Payoh swimming complex. I’m depressed after gaining 2kg & I intend to shed it off by exercising feverishly.

I left my swimsuit in my club & left with no choice, decided to put on my newly bought bikini. I looked at my reflection from the mirror & I feel so depressed seeing that I had gained weight and my hip seemed to be getting wider. I feel so self-conscious as so many pairs of eyes were staring at me when I walked to the pool. I went in, swim for 10 laps and gotten a sunburn! Sucks! I applied sunblock before I jumped into the pool and yet still get sunburn after all especially my forehead! Aarrgghh!

I realised I didn’t bring my shampoo & I ended up washing my hair with The Body Shop White Musk Shower Foam!

I was on my way to meet Bee Lian in Cineleisure when I saw Eric in Takashimaya.

I didn’t see him until he waved at me and I’m surprised to see him! I asked him why is he here and he replied saying he is meeting a friend of his. I’m tempted to ask whether is it a guy or gal but I decided not to as I’m afraid he might misunderstood my concern as a motive.

I was walking on the pavement near Mandarin Hotel when Eric called me. He said he was behind me & I turned around & indeed found him among the crowd.

He walked up to me and I inquired him,” Why you coming over?”

“Aiya, nothing to do. Might as well called my friend and asked him to meet me in Cineleiseure instead.” was his reply

I’m feeling puzzled. Why he need to do that?

Anyway, he revealed saying he meet up with Jessie yesterday (his crush sometime back) & I feel a slight pang of jealousy.

I’m trying to question myself do I like Eric sometimes. I’m afraid I’m trying to run away from the fact that I like him but trying so hard to convince myself that he was just my very good guy friend whom I can talk to anything under the sun.

Alright face it!! I didn’t accept the fact that I might like Eric because he is not the type of guy I like. I mean, he is short, not handsome, fair, sarcastic & have an attitude. If he was good looking, I think my lust would have taken over me completely and I will try ways & means to charm him. I can’t believe I’m this kind of mean person.

Eric & I went our separate ways when I meet up with Bee Lian. We purchased the tickets & watched Japanese movie ‘Bayside Showdown 2’.

The movie was quite hilarious & exciting. Afterthe show ended, we went over & had supper at Checker’s Cafe. I broke my diet rules again! I ended up eating salad, tiramisu cake, waffle ice cream & a cup of latte! Whoah~

I had a missed call from Guoyi while I was in theatres. I sms him and he replied he was just intending to call up to say hi to me & his mobile phone is on low battery. I didn’t think otherwise until the next day when realization struck me. Ws he trying to ask me out on V-Day? Hahahaha.......
 
Bored at work
02.11.05 (8:34 am)   [edit]
11 Feb, Fri

Office is pretty quiet. It is Chinese New Year Day 3 and half of the office people are not around. Waking up early in the morning with thoughts of half the office colleagues are happily sleeping away especially on Chinese New Year Day 3 is awful. I literally dragged myself out of my bed.

I went to the office with lousy mood. Usually my mood will be on the extreme opposite especially coming to office on a FRIDAY morning but today is different as it is only Chinese New Year Day 3 & most of my colleagues are not around. The feeling is very yucky!

I’m feeling very full due to overeating during Chinese New Year, I need to detox for half a day & shed off all the fats baby!

8,9,10 Feb

Food consume: Too much till uncountable

Chinese New Year celebration with my family as usual. The reunion dinner this year is not as sumptuous as compared to last year plus my 2nd brother and his girlfriend is not eating with us. My mum told me he had to work overtime during Chinese New Year Eve.

My brother’s girlfriend asked me where will I be heading to after the reunion dinner. I replied saying I will be staying at home.

“Oohh.... You are not intending to go out?” she inquired.

I told her nope & asked her where she will be going out after the dinner. It turns out my brother & her are going over to Cat’s(my brother’s friend) house to play mahjong.

Sigh! I wished I could also go over to someone’s house to count down to Chinese New Year. Sigh! All my kakis seemed occupied and tat shows how small my social circle had become.

I ended up counting down alone while watching TV, surfing net (I surf bloody frequently during CNY period), eating non-stop & reading few pages of my Angela’s Ashes novel. My parents are upstairs fast asleep before the usher of Year of Rooster.

Brother asked me whether I want t go clubbing on 1st day of CNY. I’m not really keen as I feel like slacking at home reading my novels & surfing net. Anyway, I still asked around by messaging everyone & Gin & Wenlong responded.

Gin called me later in the evening & I told her I’m not going. She sounded disappointed and I’m feeling guilty for giving her false hope in the beginning.

I was asleep in my brother’s room when I received an sms from Wenlong saying he will come to Double O to find me if he can’t managed to get into Zouk.

I replied him that I’m not clubbing tonight & he returned an sms back.

“Our dancing queen learning to be good? Ok, have a great new year babe.”

Ha... Wenlong is quite humorous at certain times. Yeah~ I think I’m slightly more tamed ever since I cut down on clubbing.

Bored at home & I really can’t stop eating the snacks & bah kwa. Last checked the weighting machine & my weight had gone up to my heaviest weight 2 years ago when I’m in my poly. I’m slightly depressed.... I really need to lose all the weight and be as petite as HK actress Charmaine Sheah. I still can’t get over the fact my brother said I looked big size in comparison to Charmaine Sheah in real person.
 
Aaarrggghhh
02.09.05 (9:56 am)   [edit]
10 Feb, Thurs 02:47

Bloody hell! I gained 2.5kg & I can't stop munching on snacks! I have stop counting on my calories & I intend to shed all off by exercising feverishly on Friday!!

I posted the below message below on Ethan Hawke's Taiwanese yahoo website. Oh man! I'm real proud & impress of my command of Chinese language.

"
※ 引述<以後ㄉㄚ祖(lon770627)>之銘言：
傑洛最後是自殺嗎? ?為啥阿


我相信在戲裡Jude Law 其實已經無生活意 。因為他殘廢﹐ 他覺得永遠都贏不 過
人家。在戲中片段 Jude拿着銀獎牌﹐ Ethan說﹕'Vincent(戲 裡的角色) is never
meant to be second-rated' (Vincent 是不會坐二望一的)

在Ethan成功登上火 ﹐准備向往月球Tit an時﹐Jude覺得他的 務已完成﹐生活
這世上也沒有意義 所以決定戴着自 以前所贏得的獎牌 ﹐奔向火爐﹐結束 己的
人生。

我本人非常喜歡這 電影。最感人的 幕是Ethan把尿液詳 (sample)給他的博士 時﹐
他對Ethan說了一句 ﹕“Valid person should hold their cup using right hand
instead of left hand." (第一等人士應該用 他們的右手來拿杯 而不是用他們的
左手) 。 原來博士早已知Etha n 是 'invalid person' 而用假冒身份來瞞 一切﹐
可是他卻一直暗地 幫Ethan 一把﹐裝作什麼都 知。

除了Before Sunrise和Before Sunset,我認為 這是Ethan的第三部 作。也是所有
Ethan影迷非看不可 電影。 "
 
I'm so excited!
02.08.05 (9:51 pm)   [edit]
Wed, Feb 09

I'm so exicited! Look what I have discovered! I stumbled upon Ethan Hawke's Taiwan Yahoo Fan Club! They have 149 members and most of them are Taiwanese. I can't believe that Ethan is quite popular over in Taiwan! Whooh! I joined their yahoo fanclub & have leave a message in their message board:

'嗨！大家好！ 我无意间在网上搜 Ethan Hawke 的资料时，发现了 个网站。很兴
奋！原来Ethan 在台湾有那么多的f ans。

我是Ethan多年的die-h ard fan。自从在 和 中观赏
了他的出色的演出 ，便爱上了他。 也观看了以上的两 部戏多达十多次。

请问这里的家族成 都是台湾人吗？ 为我不是台湾人而 是土生土长的新加 人。
很高兴能认识不同 家的Ethan's fans.

我也设计了Ethan 的网站。你们有空 迎你们来！ 网址如下：

http://www.geocities.com/spicy_cool_gal/ethanp alace.htm" title="http://www.geocities.com/spicy_cool_gal/ethanp alace.htm" target="_blank"http://www.geocities.com/spic...
http://movies.groups.yahoo.com/group/ethanspalace" title="http://movies.groups.yahoo.com/group/ethanspalace" target="_blank"http://movies.groups.yahoo.co... '

As the Taiwanese usually conversed in Chinese, I decided to post my messages in Chinese. However, there was a problem. I wrote my messages using NJ Star Chinese software where I drafted my messages in Chinese before copying & paste it into their message board. I realised some words were missing & tried several times to no avail. Until realisation sinked in & I almost forget that the Taiwanese uses traditional Chinese while Singapore & China uses simplified Chinese.

Hence, I changed my draft all into traditional Chinese & did the copy & paste method.

Voila! Problem solved!! I'm keen on meeting more Ethan Hawke's fans all over the world ever since I lost conatct with my French penpal -Blandine whom is also a hard-core Ethan Hawke fan.
 
童年暗恋男明星史
02.08.05 (8:47 pm)   [edit]
我小时候大约六、 岁时，第一个迷 的偶像是梁朝伟。 他在<倚天屠龙记>里风度
翩翩的张无记深深 吸引了我。后来 <鹿鼎记>里饰演的韦小宝实 太可爱了，让
我暗恋了蔓长的五 。

十岁那年，开始喜 黎明。我常常陶 在他的首首情歌如 <深秋的黎明>，<堆积情感>等。然后碰巧看了 的作品<原振侠>，让我爱他爱到死 塌地，迷恋指数 到岌端。
收集了无数的他的 片，卡带，海报 偶像卡等，也让我 妈妈坦心了好一阵 。


在高中那段时期， 始对异性感到好 ，也是我最花心的 阶段。日剧是在高 时期，
我爱上了好多日剧 员如竹业内锋和 盯隆史在里、<一吻定情>里帅
气十足的伯原崇、<同在屋檐下>的江口洋介和福山 治、幼稚帅气的 泽秀明、可
爱的DA PUMP男组合等。

随着岁月流逝，我 成熟了。心中真 喜欢的演员用十指 都能数的到。

韩风吹袭，注意到 演员也挺多的。<蓝色生死恋>是我第一部接触韩 的阶梯，也
最早认识宋承宪和 斌。后来收看了 多部韩剧劲典 、<爱上女>主播、<冬季恋歌>等，让我爱上韩剧 别一般的细腻和 情。熹欢的韩剧演 员有李
柄宪、蔡琳、张东 、张那拉，可是 是最爱韩在石。

我现在心中只爱两 演员。一个是韩 石，另外一个就是 演出好来坞电影里
的伊森鹤克(Ethan Hawke)。

觉得好奇妙，我喜 的演员都好像不 大红大紫类型，也 许我的口味和大众 味不
太一样。
 
Unexplainable moody
02.04.05 (11:03 pm)   [edit]
3 February, Thursday

Feeling unexplainable moody & bored. I’m blur & in a daze for the whole morning. I don’t have the mood to do yet I have to start planning for my next June holiday programmes activity & also to finalize details & call up the selected stall vendors for Flea Mart event.

I really don’t feel like working today
 
我的第一篇华文日记录
02.02.05 (8:10 am)   [edit]
2月3日 时 间：00：04分

夜深人静 的时候。独自一个 在电脑面前写着 篇日记页。

好久没有写华文篇 了。 我现在的心情是非 难以形容。自从 中四那年拿了我的
第七次的作文奖项 ，就已经有六， 年停笔了。不再写 任何华文篇章了。 间一
瞬间过去了，我这 不起眼的黄毛丫 已经踏进了成人的 世界里。以前应为 级小，
华文程度在班上又 名列前茅，所以 时后的我理志要从 事华文传媒行业。

现在的我已经心灰 冷。或许自己成 了，知道人生中往 往不能得偿所愿， 且又
看到自己的华文水 已经大不如前 。 心知有数。心里也 万分说不出的难 以及
悔恨。 如果自己勤奋的试 朝向我的 梦想前进，天天都 习写作，也许距 我的
梦想不会太遥远。
 
I am 36% evil.

I could go either way. I have sinned quite a bit but I still have a bit of room for error. My life is a tug of war between good and evil.

Are you evil? find out at Hilowitz.com

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